Past 6 months have not been easy, and during this time period, I have had ups but also the downs, and the downs have been really forcing me to slow the f* down. That has not been easy, as the old me has been so used to just keep on going, no matter what. And I literally mean this, as stopping has never been the option, and now that Im taking a look back, I can tell that I had been in a constant survival mode.

And that has been the normal mentality for a long, long time – both mentally and physically. Its not easy to admit it out loud, nor really letting that fact soak in and accept it. But here we are, and now its said.

During this year I have been forced to shed the old beliefs, old thinking patterns and the old habits, that no longer serve me. And then, slowly starting to learn to take along the new habits and little by little taking the new perspectives onto the action and on use.

And the keyword really has been slowly – and on many different aspects. By slowing down not only physically but also mentally, I have been able to not only notice the on going pattern but also break down from the on going survival mode. What at first seem to be the end of the world (if being a little dramatic), actually was a blessing disguise and came along with a silver lining. For example getting a severe knee injury forced me to physically stop running but also to change my perspective on what comes to my training habits and from that, also to reflect on to how I could modify my training sessions to still stay effective but less overwhelming – both physically but also cortisol level wise.

For example doing plenty of high intensity training while having stress also on other areas of my life actually was not helping me recover from it, but adding into the cocktail. And I was training hard because my mind was feeling so damn hectic that running put my mind on ease while helping me to sort out my thoughts, but I were not aware of the side effect that it would bring along meaning that keeping my body more or less in a survival mode.

And as we all know, you can go for a while with high intensity, but in some point, you need to start taking easy and let yourself also get some rest.

Slowing down has not only been eye opening, but it has also been improving my life quality, as now the life has been less of a hectic doing but also more of mind full being. Im still not a fan of yoga and stuff, but I have found new ways to be and stay active but with more gentle approach to things.

Slowing down has actually been really helpful also what comes to relationships with others, as when you are more mind full of with yourself, you are able to be more present to others too while also being able to spot straight on, which aspects are serving the common purpose and which one aren’t doing that at all.

Understanding one’s own needs but also one’s own behavior patterns has brought with it gentleness, but also much-needed security. The fact that I am now better able to identify with my own pulse which things bring unnecessary stress to life has helped me understand even more which things bring peace but also sustainable development in my own life.

And that sustainable development precisely brings that quality, that own-looking luxury.